What else can I do?

You can provide accurate information to your children about alcohol and other drugs. To do this, you must know something about drugs. That doesn't mean becoming a drug expert, but it does mean having enough facts to support your views. Unfortunately, many parents wait until their children are involved in drugs before initiating a discussion. That's too late!

You should talk with your children before there's a problem. As early as the fourth grade, your children may have some knowledge of the drug scene. National statistics indicate that by age 12, young people begin to experiment. Much of their information will be inaccurate and will tend to glamorize drugs. That is why it's important that you be prepared to set the record straight. And remember, don't make your discussion of drugs a one shot event. Children need to be reminded often of where their parents stand on important issues such as drugs.

top

What do I say if I think my child is using drugs?

In a straightforward way, tell your child about your concern and the reasons for it: taking drugs is harmful to one's physical, mental, and social well-being. Tell your child that you are opposed to any drug use and you intend to enforce that position. What you should try to be is:

• Understanding ("I realize you're under a lot of pressure from friends to use drugs.")
• Firm ("As your parent I cannot allow you to engage in harmful activities.")
• Supportive ("I'll help you find a way to say 'No' to drugs.")
• Self-examining ("Are my own alcohol and drug consumption habits exerting a bad influence on my child?"
  

  top

• Sarcastic ("Don't think I don't know what you're doing!")
• Accusatory ("You're lying to me!")
• Stigmatizing ("You're a terrible person!")
• Sympathy-seeking ("Don't you see how much you're hurting me?")
• Self-blaming ("It's all my fault!")

Such statements tend to make the child defensive and likely to tune you out. Remember, if your child is using drugs, she or he needs your help. You may want help also. Seeking the support of other parents in your community will enable you to handle this problem in a more understanding and helpful way. Don't be afraid to be a strong parent!

If the problem becomes too much for you to handle alone, professional help should be considered. Counselors trained in working with youth and substance abuse can help re-open communication between parent and child. Outside help can supplement your efforts at home.

For more information contact your local regional prevention center.
top